Balay Mindanaw Foundation, Inc.

Kaangayan, Kalambuan, Kalinaw ... sa Mindanaw, sa Pilipinas, sa Kalibutan

Condolence Letter to Mila Teves: Tribute to Rey Magno Teves

18 Mariposa St., Cubao, QC
7 November 2009

Dear Mila,

Greetings of Peace/Kalinaw! -- just as Rey would usually greet us. My wife Doods and our family would like to convey our condolences to you and your family for the big loss of Rey. We can only imagine and sympathize with the loss to you and your family. We know that the causes of Mindanaw, of peace, of grassroots development, of federalism and of love of Davao City have lost their biggest champion. The biggest loss for me is that of a very good and kind friend in the peace movement. I first got the news by text early this morning from our common Mindanaw friend, Kaloy Manlupig. It was a saddening shock, to say the least, given Rey’s relatively young senior citizenship and with much more that should have been still ahead of him in life and in work.

Doods and I cannot forget in particular the time several years back, when we came to Davao for my part in some peace-related activity, probably on Rey’s invitation. Rey insisted that we stay in your new home, on top of proudly showing us around to some key tourist spots of “the best city in the world.” Of course, your healthy home-cooking made this much more memorable. We also met one of your two daughters, still unmarried then and helping somewhat with the family food catering business. We saw photos of your other daughter, abroad in Canada, married to a Canadian and with the first grandchild of Lolo Rey and Lola Mila. We remember the story of how you took your first real break from the food catering, with Rey’s strong encouragement and with your unmarried daughter’s help, so that you could visit that first apo. Having ourselves just become first-time grandparents last September and visited our first apo also abroad, we know the joys of reaching that stage in life. It is a pity that Rey could not enjoy this grandfather stage longer. This is so untimely, even as there is no doubt that he had already lived a full and meaningful life, and had already left a very good legacy.

By the way, you may not know this but Rey also gave our newly married daughter and her husband a honeymoon tour of Davao in May 2005. He definitely had a fallback career as a Davao tourist guide. I believe I may have once called him “Mr. Davao,” aside from definitely calling him “Mr. Mindanao” in a public forum.

Rey and I first met and became instant friends just more than 20 years ago in December 1988 at the International Conference on Conflict Resolution in the Philippines held at the Ateneo de Manila campus. He had come from Davao, I from Naga City in Bicol. We had a “triumvirate” then with Cesar Villanueva who had come from Bacolod City in Negros. In a memorable photo that we had posed for during that occasion (when we had much more hair on our heads), we seemed to have delusions of respectively representing Mindanao, Luzon and Visayas. Since then, we all know that it has been Mindanao, especially Davao, which has gained the most ground in terms of a peace movement. And we all know who laid the ground for that – no other than “Manong Rey,” as most would call him there – and sometimes in Manila.

Since 1988, I have had the privilege of being with Rey from time to time in a good number of various peace-related activities, and a few political ones, both in Manila and in Mindanao, unfortunately never once in Naga, where I could have also been his tourist guide. One highlight of Rey’s presence in many of his activities, aside from his passionate advocacies for Mindanao, peace and federalism, was his passionate rendition of Elvis Presley, the idol of his youth. He could also easily be the “Elvis Presley of Davao” or Mindanao, if not the Philippines. Naturally, we would debate about Elvis vs. the Beatles, the idols of my own youth, just a bit younger than Rey’s generation. We did not always agree on everything, like say federalism as the solution to the Bangsamoro problem. True friends need not always agree on everything, just on a few basics, like say durian. I am happy to say that I was gracious enough, despite our difference in music opinion, to gift him one Christmas with an Elvis Presley collector’s package bought during one trip I had with Doods to Vancouver.

I mean, how could anyone not like Rey? If he had enemies, they must have liked him too. I know of several instances when he would “let it be” and “turn the other cheek” for those who had maneuvered to unceremoniously ease him out of the chairmanship in a progressive pre-political party formation, or to take the credit for or simply take over the helm of certain Mindanao peace initiatives which were actually the ground work of his Mindanao Peace Advocates Conference (MPAC). He was that rare kind of leader who did not hunger for power or for glory, but only for peace and justice to get done – though sometimes even at the cost of some injustice done to him. I think he must have already forgiven them – “for they know not what they do” -- even before they could think about it. He had that greatness of self-sacrifice and to “let go” of what was not essential.

My last major activity with Rey was all of three years ago in November 2006, fittingly in Davao. That seems like ages already. So, perhaps there’s a lesson here about not losing touch with old friends. Without any previous activity partnership between us or our respective NGOs, I was able then to quickly arrange with Rey, on short notice, the local co-sponsorship by his beloved long-time base NGO, the Technical Assistance Center for the Development of Rural and Urban Poor (TACDRUP), of a Mindanao launching-forum on an international policy report on human rights and peace agreements. Rey’s quick decision on this was based not so much on a reading of the concept paper, nor on a review of organizational mandates. It was based really on complete trust of a long-time friend in the peace movement. This was how it was with Rey when it came to old friends. And it was great to have been a long-time friend of Rey’s. I and many others have been made better by the privilege of having been touched by Rey’s friendship, example and infectious spirit. He will be sorely missed by so many of us. Doods, I and our family give our solidarity to you and your family in this most difficult loss for you. May Rey rest in peace with the love that all of us have for him. Dios Mabalos, Rey and Mila…

Padayon,

Sol (also for Doods) Santos